Who the heck is Kim Jong-un?
There are war clouds gathering. But apparently only in the busy mind of the Democratic People’s Republic of Korea’s Supreme Leader, First Secretary of the Workers’ Party of Korea, First Chairman of the National Defence Commission who is also the Chairman of the Central Military Commission — Kim Jong-un.
Kim has a lot on his plate these days. He’s having to keep juggling his assorted threats to “settle scores” with the United States, while he makes friends with such American “notables” as Dennis Rodman (of all people). And while he’s at it, he still has ample time to continue with his alleged human rights violations.
He’s a dynamo.
I’m not making fun of the funny little guy. He should be taken seriously — to a point.
But Kim Jong-un’s persistent chest-pounding doesn’t seem to have it’s desired effects much outside of North Korea. Especially since the little pip-squeak doesn’t seem to have the hardware to back up his stated pledge to “annihilate the enemy.” (I think he’s talking about us.)
He’s the youngest head of state in the world (29 or 30 years old, depending on who’s counting), so a little youthful exuberance might be expected. But in recent weeks, aside from a couple of war planes sent to the region, the United States doesn’t seem to be cranking up its massive war machine to thwart any onslaught generated by the boy dictator. Or, as they call him in North Korea — “The Brilliant Comrade.”
Surely, there’s some attention being paid to Kim Jong-un in Washington. But Washington has seen and heard all of this bellicose rhetoric before. Kim Jong-un’s father, Kim Jong-il, and his father, Kim Il-sung, highlighted their careers with semi-frequent verbal attacks hurled our way.
All three of the Kim’s have known that North Korea, which is smaller than Mississippi (46,528 square miles, to Miss.’s 48,434 square miles); with it’s population (24,052,231), which is smaller than either California (38,041,430) or Texas (26,059,203); it’s antiquated war armaments (some have been described as being from the 1970s and even ’60s) — couldn’t really fight its way out of a wet paper bag.
It doesn’t matter if the capital of South Korea, Seoul, is just 20 miles across the North Korean border. An attack against South Korea, with 50,000 American troops there, would prove to be devastating to Kim Jong-un’s stated pledge to “annihilate the enemy.”
Oh, Kim Jong-un is certainly not as dumb as he looks. (but not by much.)
He’s earned two degrees. One in physics and another one from the Kim Il-sung Military University in military training. He’s even said to have studied the English language in Switzerland. In the event that he ever feels obliged to make good on any of his threats, I hope he’s learned how to say “I give.”
He’s also said to be a real fan of professional basketball, especially of Michael Jordan, his Chicago Bulls teammate Toni Kukoc and of Kobe Bryant. Jordon, Kukoc or Bryant weren’t available, so he recently befriended Dennis Rodman.
Rodman returned to the United States and proclaimed he’d met a lifelong friend. They have a lot in common. They probably discussed their mutual weirdness.
Rodman, though, should stay out of Los Angeles, Hawaii and Washington, D.C., and Austin, Texas. Those are the places that have been mentioned as potential targets for Kim Jong-un’s nuclear attacks.
Despite all of the military experts who say North Korea doesn’t have rockets that could come close to any of those places — save Hawaii — one man seems to have taken the threat seriously — Texas Gov. Rick Perry He’s the former-“future” president, who throttled his own candidacy, because he suffered from thought-incompletion syndrome.
“I think the individuals in North Korea understand that Austin, Texas, is now a very important city in America, as do corporate CEOs and other people who are moving here in record numbers,” Perry announced.
You’ve got to hand it to Perry. He’s found a way to highlight his state’s economic development, even in the face of hollow threats of nuclear annihilation.
He’s not as dumb as he looks either (but not by much).
Edward A. Owens is a three-ime Emmy Award winner and 20-year veteran of television news. Email him at freedoms@bellatlantic.net.