Just another column about Language
From time to time, I just stop; then take note of our wonderfully confounding English language.
Today is one of those times.
I鈥檝e often questioned why we use phrases like 鈥渏ump in the shower鈥� when nobody jumps into showers.
Likewise, I鈥檝e never known anybody who truly 鈥渉ops out of bed.鈥�
I鈥檝e never been in the company of somebody who got 鈥渉opping mad鈥� 鈥� or managed to 鈥渇ly off the handle.鈥�
Do people really 鈥渉it the sack鈥� or 鈥渉it the hay?鈥�
These are the tricks the English language plays on us with the countless idioms that have been devised, then used 鈥� sometimes over centuries.
If there蘑菇视频 a 鈥渂andwagon鈥� nearby, try not to 鈥渏ump on it.鈥� That could be dangerous.
Never, I mean never, 鈥渂ury your head in the sand.鈥�
Fortunately, if you plan to 鈥渂ury the hatchet,鈥� it doesn鈥檛 involve a real hatchet that could inflict real harm on another person.
I鈥檓 sure there are some people who read this and say this is silly. But I鈥檇 like to 鈥渂urst your bubble鈥� and tell you that English is full of these idioms that must be daunting to anybody who comes from another country who鈥檇 like to learn the language.
Can you imagine trying to explain to somebody from Asia that a 鈥渟keleton鈥� in somebody蘑菇视频 鈥渃loset,鈥� has nothing to do with skeletons or closets?
That would be no 鈥渨alk in the park!鈥�
Don鈥檛 take a foreigner to lunch and tell them that you鈥檙e so hungry you 鈥渃ould eat a horse.鈥�
They鈥檇 be perplexed.
They may even be 鈥渋n a pickle.鈥� They could even 鈥渇ly off the handle鈥� and 鈥渉it the roof鈥� 鈥� which has nothing to do with roofs or handles, or even pickles.
That same foreigner might be fascinated when they hear that somebody was 鈥渂orn with a silver spoon in their mouth.鈥�
Where would that spoon come from, they might ask.
And you would be compelled to explain that the person with the silver spoon, may have been on third base, and thought they hit a triple. Which requires a completely different explanation.
References to the human heart are among the most overused phrases in the English language.
There are 鈥渂roken鈥� hearts; 鈥渉eavy鈥� hearts, from the 鈥渂ottom鈥� of people蘑菇视频 hearts; somebody may become 鈥渇aint鈥� of heart; we鈥檙e always told 鈥渉ome is where the heart is;鈥� some people can be 鈥渨arm鈥�-hearted, while others can be 鈥渃old鈥�-hearted. And you can 鈥渢ake鈥� heart, with a little heart and soul.
None of those things have anything to do with the physical organs that beat inside of our bodies.
I think the overuse of the word 鈥渉eart,鈥� is some sort of language abuse.
I think I鈥檒l just 鈥渢hrow down the gauntlet鈥� and let everybody know I鈥檓 鈥渢icked off鈥� about it.
Maybe I won鈥檛. I鈥檇 probably get some 鈥渂utterflies in my stomach,鈥� or worse 鈥� 鈥渁nts in my pants,鈥� about protesting the way we Americans have taken such idiomatic license with language.
What does 鈥渟mack dab鈥� mean?
To me, it蘑菇视频 a phrase that doesn鈥檛 make a lot of sense. I know I鈥檓 probably being a bit too literal, but if you have a dab, why would you want to smack it?
I鈥檇 suggest if you feel compelled to stick the phrase 鈥渟mack dab鈥� into a sentence (not counting the way I just did it) then, perhaps, you might first try to find a more suitable phrase. 鈥淭hat蘑菇视频 not brain surgery,鈥� you know.
I鈥檇 also suggest you avoid using rhyming phrases like 鈥渆asy peasy.鈥�
There are many phrases that have nothing to do with how they sound.
鈥淭hin-skinned鈥� has nothing to do with skin.
A 鈥渢all order鈥� has nothing to do with height.
A 鈥渟now job鈥� has nothing to do with weather.
Playing 鈥渟econd fiddle鈥� has nothing to do with music.
A 鈥渟tiff upper lip鈥� has nothing to do with anybody蘑菇视频 face.
鈥淕reen thumbs鈥� don鈥檛 have anything to do with the color of anybody蘑菇视频 thumbs.
And, finally, if something is a 鈥減iece of cake,鈥� it has nothing, whatsoever to do with dessert.
That蘑菇视频 the 鈥渘ail in the coffin.鈥�
Edward A. Owens is a multi-Emmy Award winner, former reporter, and anchor for Entertainment Tonight, and 40-year TV news and newspaper veteran. E-mail him at freedoms@bellatlantic.net.